I made the mistake about three months back of renting “Spiderman, the Movie” for my son. We proceeded to watch it about 16 times over the next five days, and as soon as “Spiderman 2” hit the theatres, we were there in line, waiting to see what adventures ‘ol Spidey would get himself into.
Soon, all of my son’s playtime was consumed with creating and playing out new scenarios in which one or more of his play toys would succumb to the ruthless cruelty of Dr. Octopus (a McDonald’s Action figure with construction paper tentacles taped to it’s sides). Just when all appeared hopeless for the poor victim, Spiderman, the hero would arrive, destroy the villain and save the day!
Being a woman with little experience around boys, I worried for a while about the violence of my son’s play. In his imagination, Spiderman never just slows down Dr. Octopus, say maybe breaking his kneecaps, giving enough time for the authorities to step in. No, when my son plays, Dr. Octopus is completely destroyed. I voiced my concern over this fierce approach to my husband. He just laughed! “What you need to worry about,” he told me, “is if he ever starts to let the villain win. Otherwise, he’s just looking for a hero to save the day, just like the rest of us.”
Just like the rest of us. Is it true? Are we all just going through life looking for a hero? Biographer Kitty Kelley asserts that “a hero is someone we can admire without apology.” I think we can agree that is something we’d all like to see. With all of the crime, corruption and yes, even politics going on in the world lately, I have to admit that I am always on the lookout for someone who is brave and courageous – who actually makes a difference- and who doesn’t have an alternate agenda for doing so.
But I am haunted by the line in “Spiderman 2” when Aunt Mae tells Peter “I think there’s a hero in all of us...” Whether or not she knew Peter was Spiderman at the time (a topic that spurred much debate in our household), her point is clear. We all have the capacity to act heroically.
YIKES – does that scare you as much as it does me?
I mean, seriously, who has time to be a hero? I have laundry to do and dishes to wash and groceries to buy and floors to clean and lunches to make and homework to help with – not even mentioningmy job and time with my “significant other” – and really, is it too much to ask for a few minutes in the bathroom alone? How can I be a hero and get all of that done too?
Which brings us to our definition of “hero”. If you at all followed the Olympic Games during the past few weeks, I’m sure you saw that the Media measured heroism by the number of medals earned or points scored, or, at the very least, those people with stories sensational enough to bring in the big ratings. In other words, the story has to be big to qualify as heroic.
Not very encouraging for you and me, eh?
Journalist Edgar Watson Howe gives what I consider to be a much more reassuring definition of a hero: “a boy doesn’t have to go to war to be a hero; he can say he doesn’t like pie when he sees there isn’t enough to go around.” In other words, the little things we do can be as heroic as the great acts of valor that gets all the attention.
You mean you can be a hero just by doing the laundry? You bet! Imagine what would happen if that laundry didn’t get done for a week or two. Or if you did the laundry, but with constant complaints over the amount of clothes your family wears and all of the spaghettio stains on their shirts. It’s the little things – the attitude with which we approach our every day lives that makes all the difference in the world.
What does it all mean? We don’t have to hold out for Spiderman to come and save the day! We’ll do that ourselves, small step by small step. True, we may not be recognized by the media for our cheerful handling of the sink full of dishes or the patient listening to our child sound out the lines in a book. But they are heroic acts all the same. Our ultimate reward, if any? A smile, a hug, or an offhand word of thanks we weren’t expecting. But most of all, the knowledge we make a difference – to the people who matter the most in this world – our families. What more do we need to save the day?
